Waiting by Mary Castellano

As I read the beautiful reflections on times of waiting by our YA Community, I can help but be reminded of the most crucial time of waiting in my own life.

For those who went to college, you probably remember the post-graduation anxiety of waiting to hear back from the dozens of job applications you spent all summer sending out. I, too, spent the whole summer of 2017 sending out job applications. Although I graduated with a degree in Theology, I still wasn’t exactly sure what I wanted to do with it. Like many seniors in college, the final semester was a hazy one for me. My future felt like driving over the American Legion Bridge on a foggy morning – I knew I would come out on the other side, I just had a hard time seeing the road.

The odd thing about my job hunting journey is that I actually did have a job lined up when I graduated in May. But as soon as I took my first lunch break on the job, I knew in my heart that it wasn’t right. I sat in my car eating out of a brown paper bag, venting to my mom on the phone. On that warm summer day, I heard the voice of God in my heart distinctly say, “I have something better for you.”

I ended up turning down three job offers that summer. I had different excuses for turning down each one, but ultimately none of them felt right. Despite that fact I was anxious about it, I was still able to sleep at night because I put my trust in God. Like many aspects of the Faith, trusting in God is hard to explain. So I’ll put it to you this way: Every night before I fell asleep, I continued to hear God’s ever present voice in my heart amidst the peaceful darkness: “I have something better for you.”

Finally, I accepted a job offer that I thought was perfect. It was a youth ministry job in the small town where my long-distance boyfriend lived. Perfect! Except, that it wasn’t in God’s plan. After one of the most emotional weeks of my life, I had to turn down yet another job offer, which also ended my long term relationship.

Two weeks later I got a job interview with a woman named Ingrid Sanchez-Seymour and Alison Fram.

Three years later, I’m in charge of virtually bringing the Mass to the entire parish during a pandemic.

Just because we follow God’s plan for our lives doesn’t mean it’s going to be a breeze. Jesus said it himself, following Him won’t be easy. But it will be fulfilling, satisfying, and right. This year alone I’ve noticed more gray hairs in the mirror because I’m continuously being pushed further and further out of my comfort zone. Is there a new challenge to face every week? Yes. Is it still worth the effort when you feel like you don’t know what h*ll you’re doing. Yes!

I encourage everyone reading this to entrust your life to the Lord. And keep praying for the ongoing Grace to do so. I promise you that your life will not be boring once you’ve handed the pen back to the Author.

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